PLEASE STOP CALLING ME OUT MY DEAR TASTY FOOD #5

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THE TOURNAMENT

Yesterday I had a dream with my dear food. Do you know what was it? I had entered a food eating competition. Who would eat the most food would win. I had passed in the selection for the tournament. The first round was easy. A teenager with about 6 flesh tunnels on his face, his face was looking awkward, his hair wasn’t combed properly and his hair was shaped in horizontal spikes. There was also white dust all over his face. After some time, when the competition began, they placed fifty-four mangoes in both of our sides. This wasn’t a big deal for me, I used to eat sixty mangoes each day in the last summer. My thoughts were interrupted by the umpire’s voice “three, two, one, start eating”. After some time the teenager shouted(after finishing his twenty-fifth mango) “ahh! my stomach is full I can’t eat anymore”, but I finished all my mangoes before he stopped eating his mangoes and instead also ate all mangoes he left out. The umpire announced, “Golu wins the match”. After I was declared the winner of the first match the umpire told me privately that I needed to win one more match to reach the finals. In the beginning of the second match, a fat man(but not fatter than me) sat in front of me for the second round. They placed forty-six sliced of pineapples on both of our sides( this also was not a big deal for me) and again the umpire shouted: “three, two, one, start eating”. The pineapple was tasty and I easily ate all of them but my opponent was not less he also ate all his slices of the pineapples at the same time. The umpire was astonished whom to declare the winner?!!?So he decided to set another round, but before the umpire was about to start my opponent asked for a break for some hours. The umpire agreed and we both went to empty our stomach’s for the next round. We went to the washroom just to know there was only one washroom and my opponent would take some hours for doing ‘potty’, so we decided that I would use the washroom first to empty my stomach as if he would go I would need to poop in my pants. So I went to the washroom just to know that there was no toilet paper and when I finished emptying my stomach I needed to take out water from the flush to wash my butt. I came out after emptying my stomach and he went in. I needed to wait there for some hours for my opponent to come out and so happened. Now finally the time arrived for the game to begin and seventy-eight bowls of gulab-jamuns were kept beside both of us and as usual, the umpire shouted: “three, two, one, start eating”. My opponent gave me a tough competition by finishing sixty-nine bowls of gulab jamuns, but this time I couldn’t complete all of the gulab-jamuns but still, I won by eating seventy-two bowls of gulab jamuns. I somehow(with my heavy stomach) left in the air full of joy that I qualified for finals. The umpire told me that the finals were going to be held in a boxing ring which was two kilometres away from here. He even said that they would provide the transport for the finals. So I and the umpire left for the finals when we reached I saw a huge audience there for watching our final. There was a giant man with a huge belly(fatter than me). I entered in the ring and sat in front of my opponent. And now we were served one-hundred-forty-six samosas. This was a deal for me. A foreign professional umpire came and shouted: “three, two, one, start eating”. I kept on eating and eating one after another and finished one-hundred-forty-four samosa’s as my opponent only could eat one-hundred-thirty-six samosas. I couldn’t control my feelings I was filled with joy that I won the final, but I couldn’t leap because my stomach was full. They gave me ‘One crore rupees’ as a prize. I came out thinking what all could I do with this money in my whole life my father would be impressed with me. Suddenly something was shaking my butt. I went to a public toilet because of my emergency. I went there only to know I had loose motions and all this was a dream. Keep reading to find out what disaster will occur in the next part.

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